The Lesson For All of Us: Self-care is Essential
I’ve started this blog post a few times. I’ve edited, removed and adjusted. Because nothing has felt right. I was trying to write something that would satisfy everyone. That would bring everyone peace. But I realize now that that isn’t possible. We are all so different. Everyone will react and respond to what’s happening in the world right now in different ways. And that is ok.
I’ve gone through a multitude of emotions myself in the last few days. From being judgmental and dismissive to feeling sheer panic and fear, and then to calmness and acceptance and then back to a bit of panic and anxiety. It’s probably the shortest amount of time I’ve experienced all these things in. And I’ve been feeling so compelled to share my heart with you on this. But instead of writing to you, I’m going to write to myself. Because the things that I feel right now and the things that are going through my head are likely going through yours too. And all of these thoughts are teaching me something. Something that I feel I need to share with myself and with you. Something I feel like I need to learn too. We all need this message. So here it goes:
Dear You,
I know that you are confused right now. You’re caught between normal life and a world where everything is chaotic and full of fear. The dichotomy between these two worlds is especially difficult and is what keeps you up at night. Stuck between what you want to do and what you should be doing. Stuck making really hard decisions when your heart is in one place but your gut is telling you otherwise. You’ve always believed that when things like this happen, they happen for a reason. And I know that you still believe that. Collectively, we needed a wake-up call. And individually we each needed our own wake-up call. You’re feeling that deeply right now.
Collectively, we are learning about self-care. Learning that to care better for the world, we need to go inward. That we need solitude. That we need space. Space allows us to grow. To expand. To build. To improve. Space cultivates kindness and love. When we are on-the-go so much we lose our connection to the self. Because we live from one task to the next. We disconnect completely from our own hearts. And from other people’s hearts. We become unaware of how much love exists around us. This is a trying time. We are seeing a lot of negativity. A lot of judgement. A lot of fear. A lot of sadness. A lot of panic. And yet we forget that the opposite exists in an equal amount. Positivity. Acceptance. Love. Happiness. Calm.
With everything closing down and the daily grind literally coming to a stop, we notice just how much goes on and all the things that function within a day. We see how much we push every day to get every little detail right. We see the amount of work that goes into running things the way there do. And yet, we realize that even though these things have stopped, we are still OK. Things may look and feel drastically different, but we are still OK. In what instance would everything stop like this? What does it take for us to just slow down? Something like this? This is the extreme that the universe needed to take to get us to listen? That in itself should tell us a lot. Something needs to change.
Isn’t it interesting to see photos and videos of what the world looks like when we retreat into our own homes? How collectively we are all doing the same thing right now? How we all are changing plans, adjusting, moving things around, so that we can stay home and care for ourselves and others? Isn’t it interesting to see how we are all capable of choosing ourselves if we wanted to? If we needed to? That we really can take care and nourish ourselves? And how that looks the same everywhere right now? And how we can actually all connect in ways we didn’t think possible or worth our time before?
I think we have been given a lot of wake-up calls recently. We’ve seen multiple natural disasters. We’ve seen the sudden and tragic loss of people in our lives or people we are familiar with. We’ve seen how fast things change. How precious life really is. How much kindness can actually do. How all those things we constantly worry about are not worth losing time with our loved ones. How those little arguments are also not worth losing time over. We keep seeing it over and over again. And yet, we clearly didn’t get the message. I hope this time we will.
The truth is that the world has been through this before. The earth has handled this before. It has survived this before. It’s disguised as something different this time (as it always is), but it is actually the same. We have to trust in that knowledge and wisdom. It will get us through this too.
So, what are you learning through this?
You’re learning self-trust. Something that you have struggled with a lot in the past. Trusting that you are enough to handle whatever comes your way. That even though you are physically alone right now, there is nothing more that you need right now other than yourself. That if the time comes and you need to make decisions about what to do, that you will be able to make them. That even though you feel alone, you are not alone. That your fear doesn’t have to be bigger than you right now. That you are able to be calm even if everything around you is the opposite. That your gut instinct has your back.
You’re learning just how important your health is. You’ve always had a bit of a distance between you and your health. Even though you always know and trust that you’ll be fine, in the last year you’ve gotten sick more than usual. That was trying to teach you that you still need to take care of your health. That it is of the utmost priority. That there shouldn’t be a distance between you and your health. That it is part of you and should be nourished like anything else.
You’re learning that your message has been meant to be shared all this time. You’ve doubted yourself so much and yet, here we are. In the midst of all of this, it all comes back to self-care. The core of who you are. It comes back to the same message you have felt called to share for all these years. You need to trust in that calling. It is not silly. It connects to all of the other things you care so deeply about. To your heart. And it is just as important and valid as anyone else’s message.
You don’t need to edit yourself. Or your message. Let it be as it is. It wants to come to you and from you in this way. So let that happen. And don’t be afraid to share it. This is the time to create the life that you truly want. The one that is truly in your heart. The world has literally given you the space to. The time is now.
You’re learning more appreciation for yourself. For your family. For your friends. For your home. For nature. For communication. For advocating for yourself. There is so much appreciation than there ever was before. And that is perhaps the most beautiful thing to come out of all this.
Stay strong. Stay safe. Stay open. Stay you.
Lots of love,
K.