Anxiety and the Transition to Post-Quarantine Life
It’s weird. We are not quite in post-quarantine life yet. We are just barely even at the point of transition. And yet, it feels like there’s something looming around the corner. I felt a bit of a shift near the end of last week, and honestly, instead of feeling relieved that quarantine may be over soon, I’ve felt more anxious and even a bit sad.
I’m not ready.
I’m not ready for post-quarantine life. I’m not ready to face a new way of living yet. The unknown of the future feels scary right now. When will I be able to go to a grocery store and not worry about what I’m touching and how much distance I’m keeping between people? When will I be able to go for a walk and not worry about mistakenly reading a sign wrong and getting told I’m not following the rules? When will I not have a rush of anxiety when I’m about to leave the house? When will a plan I make no longer be “tentative” and “subject to change”. When will I have a stable foundation to stand on?
Thinking about all these things heightens my anxiety. But the sadness is what lingers. Grieving the way we lived before. Grieving the soon-to-come loss of comfort and safety that being home has given me. Grieving the things that won’t happen this year. That’s what makes me wake up with a heavy heart. I’ve really enjoyed this time at home. It has most definitely come with it’s own challenges, but my little homebody heart has felt quite full and content from having extra time for myself.
But regardless, I realize that no matter what I always have me to come home to. As thrown off as I can get by change and as anxious as I can get, I don’t want to forget me. And all the growth that has come out of this time. I can always come back to this space. To the things that bring me joy. To the people that bring me joy. The the rituals that bring me peace. To the future goals/visions I hold dear. All of these things are always here to come home to.
If you’re feeling this way too, here’s what I have to say: anxiety about post-quarantine life is completely warranted. We are braving the unknown again. And we may have to do it again and again. Give yourself a bit of grace if you let that anxiety take you over. It’s okay. It needs to find it’s way out. Talk about it, share it, write, cry, do whatever you need to to let it out. And trust that you will always have you to come back to. Your heart. Your inner world that holds nothing but love for you. Your home. Perhaps even this new perspective you have created for yourself since quarantine started. That perspective always there for you to come back to.
Make a list. Of all the things that bring you joy. Things that are a part of your life now and things that you are looking forward to in the future. Or even joyful things that you’ve experienced in the past. Write them all down. Forget about the boundaries of quarantine for now. Let your heart run free. List everything you can think of and keep that list somewhere safe. Anytime you feel anxious about post-quarantine life, pull that list out. Read each one. Allow it to bring a smile to your face. Even if it doesn’t change the cause(s) of your anxiety, it may give you a moment of peace. A moment of joy. A moment of gratitude.
If you’re anxious/worried about what’s to come, know that I am with you. Please be kind to yourself. Especially if you’re a highly sensitive person. It’s not wrong or bad to feel things deeply. It’s not wrong or bad to feel anxious and feel like you’re letting everything in right now. You’re doing your best. And I’m right alongside you. Taking this one step at a time. Doing my best with you. Together we will brave unknown.
Lots of love.